Updates, Office Hockey, and New Extreme (well kinda) Sports

Wow, it's been quite a while since I've written anything on here!! I guess my daily 90-120 minute commute has made me second think frivilous time consuming activies like blogging. The new job is great, but it, coupled with the commute, has also led me to a much stricter sleep schedule. Most nights I'm in bed by 10:30pm now and up before 7:00am!! I don't know if that EVER happened at BkE!

My crazy schedule hasn't interupted my crazy dreams, however, just my writing about them. Here's a wacky one from a few nights ago...

*** Dreamt December 2-3, 2008 ***
I was playing roller-hockey with all my friends from The Office (yes, that's tv's The Office). In my dream, Jim & I were best friends and I may have actually worked at Dunder Mifflin. Anyway, we were all at this big roller rink, skating and playing hockey. Angela glared at us from the stands. Jim was REALLY good, and was telling me about the league he played on. Pam and I decided that she and I would join an adult beginners hocker league, then the following season we could join Jim's league. It seemed like a great idea, and we were all pretty psyched on it.

Then everything changed. I was the host of a television show the premise of which was that I'd go out and try new, exciting, or wacky extreme sports from around the world. The first sport I did was somewhat resemblant to ice dancing in that you and a partner of the opposite gender were on a moving skate and doing acrobatic dancing. It differed from ice dancing dramatically, however, in that you weren't on ice, you were on a long skateboard. Not only that, but while on the skateboard the guy was wearing one long snow ski, and the girl was wearing huge graphite spheroids on her feet. So this was how it worked: The couple is wearing these things and riding a skateboard together through an obstacle course, meanwhile they're doing acrobatic dancing, but the result of the footwear was that the girl had to jump or be lifted whenever the guy turned so she wouldn't be taken out by the long ski he was wearing and the ball-things on her feet made it so she could actually jump off the board and skid along on the ground and slide over obstacled and stuff. I actually tried it in my dream. It was tough.

Then I was whisked away to China to try another extreme sport: Synchonized Meditation. This sport had been popular in China for thousands of years, but only now the west was learning about it. Here's how it worked: A group of 2 or more people (usually wearing swimming suits) would lather vaseline all over themselves, then all lie in a big group on the backs RIGHT next to each other. Something about the vaseline made their mental connections more fluid. So all these people are lying right next to each other meditating, and suddenly all of them would move in perfect unison. Basically the idea was that you would mediate and become so "one" with the group, that you could sense the movements everyone else was making AS they were making them, so you could also make the movements. I was doing this episode from the Great Wall of China, and there were TONS of groups of slimely people all over the wall slinking around as groups. It was bizarre, but it was my show so I had to give it a go. Me and my host in China got all greased up and lied down side by side, but we were having a tough time getting synched up. We'd both move, but they were different movements. I guess I didn't have the knack for it.

***

Psychic Dream II

I am not even making this up!!

*** Dreamt Nov 5-6, 2008 ***

I don't really remember much of my dream last night, except that at one point in my dream, I was being introduced to several people. We were standing at the edge of a field kinda out in the farmy-area of West Point (of which there's, sadly, less and less these days) and there were several people there whom I didn't know. Somebody was introducing us all to each other and the last person introduced to me was Marnette Hansen.

Marnette Hansen and I met in Mrs. Flinders' 4th grade class about a thousand years ago when we were 9. She and I were chatter-boxes and frequently got into trouble for talking in class. Anyway, although we continued to go to the same schools until we graduated high school, after elementary school we hardly ever spoke...not 'cuz we hated each other or anything (I don't think), we just hung out with different people.

Anyway, in my dream I was pretty surprised to see her and we kinda caught up a little.

***

So today I check my facebook and find that last night a friend of mine sent me 5 or 6 friend recommendations, the last of whom on the list was Marnette Hansen!!! I'm dead serious!! Now I don't believe in psychics or anything crazy like that, but isn't that weird?!? This is something that happens to me often enough that I've gotta think there's something to it...who knows what kindof energy is out there that our brain has the potential to decode? The human brain I tell ya...amazing/weird stuff.

Pyschic Dream?

*** Dreamt Oct 29-30, 2008 ***

I was in my house talking to my roommates in the kitchen. I decided to go to the front room to watch tv or something, and as I was headed that I way I noticed Michael (our former roommate) coming up the porch. I hadn't seen Michael in some time, so I was pretty happy to see him.

"What's up?!?", I said as he approached the door.

"Oh not much, man. I just wanted to see how that mechanic worked out.", he replied.

You see, in real life I'd spoken with him on the phone a few days prior and asked him about where to get my car door repaired, and he'd recommended a mechanic to me.

"Ya know", I said. "I haven't been able to contact him. I left him a message, but he hasn't called back." This is true, it happened in real life.

"Oh, that's weird", He replied.

Then I woke up.

***

Well last night (the day following that dream), Michael actually DID just drop by our house. It wasn't quite the same circumstances...in my dream it was light outside and in real life when he showed up it was already dark; also in my dream he was wearing a brown flannel shirt whereas in real life he was wearing his lifeguard hoodie. Still, I couldn't help but find it interesting how after not having seen Michael for at least a couple of months, that I had a dream about him dropping by and then he actually dropped by, all in the same 24-hour period.

....oooOOOOOoooo.....

Those crazy apostates...

Here's a doozey of a dream from not too long ago...

*** Dreamt Oct 12-13, 2008 ***

I'd moved to the East coast, I'm thinking New Hampshire or possibly the Boston area...I think in my dream it was actually one of those two, then switched to the other. Anyway, I decided to go check out my ward there, and when I got there I found that their Sunday services were QUITE different than those to which I'd grown accustomed. We all arrived at church, and immediately people started asking me who I was and why I was there, I explained that I'd just moved from Utah, but that I was LDS, so it was okay...I was SUPPOSED to be there. They seemed a bit concerned about me being there, but I WAS, after all, LDS, so they let me be, but they all kept staring at me with worried looks on their faces.

We were all suddenly on a huge wooden boat. An ark, really. I lazily walked around while people stared at me cautiously. Every now and then I'd open a door to see what was inside, and more often than not there were several people in long robes and pointy hands, who'd notice me and then shout, "No no no! Get out!" at me.

Eventually we landed at our destination, which looked like a really big, stone, oil platform. People formed lines and we filed out towards illuminated kiosks in the stone. When you made it to the front of the line, you'd put your name in a little glass tube, put that tube into a drop box, then slide the drop box into the big structure...after a few moments, the drop box would re-open, and have on it 2 numbers. The numbers showed you when you'd be resurrected...the first number was the day of the resurrection, and the second was the order on that day. My number was "6 23", which meant that I'd be the 23rd person resurrected on the 6th day of the resurrection.

At about this point I realized what was going on here; these Latter Day Saints were following the principles taught in D&C Section 42, which had been deemed not doctrine was NOT to be followed.

Something needed to be done.

I called my home ward and asked for assistance, explaining the Section 42 situation. They immediately sent out Bishop Drake, a member of my parents' stake high council. It was good to see Bishop Drake, and the two of us headed back to the ark so he could see what was going on. We, again, took the ark out to the stone platform, and he agreed this was a bad situation. We walked around the ark a bit more, and came to a room where Jesus was. ...Yep.

He'd, actually, come in answer to our prayer to destroy these lost souls. I didn't actually see them destroyed, but I knew he'd done so. So we were standing there, thanking him for coming, and he was very courteous, and was saying things like, "Oh, it's nothing. That's what I'm here for." Then I decided this was a great opportunity to find out some good info, so I asked him what I needed to do to become rich. He said, "Okay, write this down...", I grabbed and pencil and paper and waited on bated breath. "www.FunkyNeonFish.com", he said to me. I wrote it down...then I looked up, confused, "really?" I asked. "Nah", he said. We all had a good laugh at his joke. Then he asked me, "Do you REALLY need to know what to do to become rich?" I thought about it, and realized I really didn't, so I said, "No...I guess I don't". He seemed satisfied with that.

We thanked him, and started to leave as he knelt down to pray. Somehow, via prayer, he was going to leave as well.

I came out of the ark and my family was all there, and we started off down the street towards an open-air mall just ahead. It was about then, that I realized I was in my underwear, which - surprisingly - didn't make me feel overly ashamed, except that there was a huge hole in the butt of them. I grabbed an 8.5"x11" piece of paper to hold behind me to cover the hole, and I decided that at the next place available, I'd buy a pair of jeans.

*** ***

For those interested, D&C 42 is DEFINITELY not a good section to not follow. It's the "Law of the Church"...spelling out the responsibilities of priesthood holders, and dictating much about how things in the church are to be carried out.

Jurassic Camp

I've had several good dreams in the last few weeks that I've been delinquent on posting...I'll try to get them up here in the next few days...

*** Dreamt October 1-2, 2008 ***

I was at a scout camp. Not really sure what camp it was...one of the big scout camps where several troops are up there at a time, each for a week. It was quite late at night, and there had just been some big camp-wide meeting around a big campfire. Now that the meeting was over it was time for the individual groups to return to their respective camps.

As we headed back I noticed how well lit the whole camp seemed to be, despite the late hour. I mentioned it and another scout told me it was because of the crystals. I hadn't noticed them until just then, but suddenly I noticed that all over the camp there were these little ponds (about the size of a big swimming pool someone would have in their backyard) and right next to each pond was a tripod build from 3 tall logs lashed together at the top, upon which rested a rather huge (probably the size of a small car), blueish, glowing stone. I was very impressed by them, and understood that they were there so that people could swim in the ponds at night.

I made my way up to where my camp was, and when I got there I discovered I was at the Ray B. West building (the English department) at Utah State University. I climbed some stairs until I was on the 3rd floor, then I went over to one of the windows that faced the Quad, and to my horror I saw a 20-foot tall Tyrannosaurus Rex-like dinosaur causing mass mayhem. It was chasing students around, snapping at them, and shoving them with it's nose. At one point I was sure it was going to eat somebody, but then it just shoved him to the ground. I was scared, but rather puzzled why it wasn't eating anybody. Then I saw the baby dinosaur!! Another T-Rex-like monster, maybe 10 feet tall came into view and I realized the big one wasn't eating them, it was herding them so the baby could eat them!!

***

It was about then that I woke up. No actual blood or carnage, but still, somewhat unnerving.

Super Dream

*** Dreamt Sept 20-21, 2008 ***

I was superman. That's right, the cape-wearing, high-flying, man of steel. And I felt awful. I'd been doing a lot of thinking and had noticed that in my feats of daring-do that I'd actually created quite of bit of destruction throughout Metropolis. I was just trying to save the world, but as a side effect I'd actually caused some major problems for some people.

I flew down to this video store through which I'd recently thrown some super villain. I went in to apologize for the damage and to find out if there was anything I could do to help, but the guy went off on me. I'd actually caused so much damage that the guy couldn't pay for repairs and he'd ended up losing his business. I felt so bad.

I flew outside and rounded up some of my super buddies (spiderman and aqua man), and we decided that we were going to go around the city and try to repair anything that we'd accidentally damaged. At the top of my list was a sky scraper that I'd somehow knocked over. It was tilted considerably to one side, and was now leaning on another building. I flew over to it and started pushing it back upright. Spiderman, who was down on the ground, had attached several webs to the top of the building and was pulling to help give me some leverage....although I really doubt he was helping, I mean, c'mon, this is a BUILDING we're moving, and I was freakin' superman!

I got the building upright, and felt some sense of accomplishment. I looked down at Spidey, gave him a thumbs up and we headed of to find some more of our damage.

*** ***

This was a rather unusual dream for me, not so much because of the content of the dream, but the fact that I was somebody else. Often in my dreams I'm in situations that I've never actually (nor ever could be in)...I've been able to fly, I've been an olympian, I've been lots of stuff...but it's always been ME. In this dream I was superman; not me with the powers of superman...I was him. I'm not really sure why that stood out so much to me, but it was definitely something unusual for me to have a completely different identity in my dream.

Do you ever dream you're somebody completely else (not just you in bizarre/impossible circumstances)?

GarlickDance 2009: Silent Films

The script has been selected for next years GarlickDance film festival! And the winning script "writer" was me!! Ha!! Okay...the victory isn't nearly as impressive as it sounds, because I didn't really write anything (you'll notice I put "writer" in quotes). My movies tend to be very visual and action driven...and as such the real trick for me is figuring out how I can let the characters say the lines in the script without interfering with my action. So this year I had the idea to submit a script that was blank...basically a dialogue-less script, and it won! Crazy!! Here's what I submitted as my script:

"(This is a dialogue-less script. There is to be no speaking by characters, nor other means of delivering lines as has been used in prior GarlickDance films. As per GarlickDance festival rules, a narrative prologue/postlogue is allowed, but once the film "starts" there is to be no speaking, subtitled actions, or dialogue captions. As with all GarlickDance films, background music with lyrics is allowed so long as the lyrics are not used as a means of delivering lines.)"

Several people have, in past years, complained about being forced to follow the script...this gives those people a chance to have complete freedom as directors. Well...almost complete freedom. So that there will still be a common thread through all the films, it was decided that each film is required to contain: A Duck, A Flower, and A Cutting Tool. These can appear in the films as overtly or as subtly as the directors desire...they've just gotta be in there somewhere. The idea behind having these objects is that they're fairly random, although common enough that it shouldn't be TOO hard to stick them in the films. Traditionally a big part of the GarlickDance Film Festival has been seeing how each director chose to use the same lines in different ways...hopefully these required "objects" will provide a similar How-will-this-director-use-them kinda thing.

Anyway, I'm excited to start. I laid in bed for a good hour before I fell asleep last night, thinking of ideas for dialogue-less films...no real winners yet, but something will come I'm sure.

Tribond: "The Olympics", "Baltimore", "Jodie Foster"

If your guess was 3 things featured in my dream Sunday night, then you get a point!!

*** Dreamt Aug 31-Sept 1, 2008 ***

I was in Logan at the huge new Olympic speed speed-skating venue with my parents. We had pretty amazing seats and were having a great time watching the skaters cruise around the rink as they strove to make it to the finals. As the night started to wind down, my parents started discussing whether they were going to go back to West Point or if they should just go to Baltimore, Maryland.

I asked what was in Baltimore, and my mom pulled out his huge genealogy poster she and my aunt had been working on. I didn't know how to read it, 'cuz it wasn't really a pedigree chart...more like a big table with names in the column and row headings, and smiley-face stickers in several of the squares. Apparently my mom had found some long-lost relatives that now lived in Maryland, so she wanted to go visit them.

As this discussion was happening, Jodie Foster showed up. She came and sat right next to me. She was very nice and was talking to EVERYBODY around us. I really wanted to take a picture to prove I'd seen her, but all I had was my cell phone camera and I was embarrassed to take of picture of her with it. So I set the phone on my lap like I was texting and kept trying to take stealthy pictures of her, but none of them turned out. Sorry. :(

*** ***

"Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit..."

*** Toned-Down on September 4, 2008 ***


Undoubtedly by publishing this I'm just opening up a can of worms, however, this is my soap box to the world, so I feel it necessary to vent.

My roommate Thad invented this game called "Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit". In a devious act to back up the claims made in his game, he then wrote a wikipedia page about it, so that he could say he didn't invent it. In a stroke of pure genius he changed some of the rules on the wiki page from his own rules, so it appears that he plays a variation of the "original" version.

The basic idea is that if you can convey the phrase "Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit..." to a person on the first day of the month before they have a chance to say it to you, you have successfully stolen their luck for the month.

You may be surprised to hear that Thad doing this to me doesn't annoy me...although I'm sure you won't be to learn that something else does!! "Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit" is one of the bizarre little Thadisms that I've come to know in my tenure as one of his roommates. When he does it to me, it's almost endearing, 'cuz he's such a strange little fellow from time to time. When other people do it to me, however, it kind of makes me want to KILL PEOPLE.

When Thad 'Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit's me I think, "GAH!! He got me again!!" When other people do it to me I think, "This isn't my game!! What's wrong with you? You're supposed to get Thad!". When Thad gets me, I don't try to get my other roommates who aren't around...I warn them and advise them to get Thad before he can get them.

To be honest, what annoys me isn't the game or that others are using this Thadism against me...it's that they think that they "got me", that they somehow beat me to the punch and out-smarted me. The truth of the matter is that I couldn't care LESS about getting them. The only person I care to 'get' is the originator Thad

Now I'm sure I just offended several people, because several people did it to me this month whom I KNOW read my blog now and then...although ALL of them got me HOURS after Thad did, I might add, at which point I could have text messaged all of them and got them WAY before they "got me", but I don't WANT to get them!! GAAHHHHH!!!!!

Okay. I've said my peace. I'm sure that several readers of this will, out of spite, "Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit" me next month. And once again I'll be incredibly annoyed and be forced to verbally abuse them to myself.

Let's Talk Radio

I love talk radio. No wait, I hate talk radio. Okay...I kinda love to hate talk radio.

Traditionally my car radio has 3 stations programmed into it: x96.3fm KXRK "Live, Local, Alternative", Arrow 103.5fm KRSP "Utah's Classic Hits", & 94.1fm KODJ "Good Times, Great Oldies". This gives me the mix of "Radio From Hell with Kerry, Bill, & Gina" in the mornings, then alternative rock and Beatles when I need it during the rest of the day. I also try to keep the local NPR (National Public Radio) station close at hand to listen to "Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me" and "Car Talk" on the weekends, as well as "All Things Considered" in the evenings sometimes.

Recently, however, after my morning drive to work (during which I still listen to Kerry, Bill, & Gina), I've been changing the station to KVNU 610am Talk Radio. Notably this station plays "Rush Limbaugh", "Dr. Laura", "KVNU: For The People", "Sean Hannity", and "Coast to Coast Live". Luckily I don't listen to the radio much, because I don't think I could stand any of the people on these programs, but in moderation I'm actually quite entertained.


"Rush Limbaugh" - Super obnoxious, and yet if I'm just running an errand and his program's on, I usually listen. He's actually pretty funny.


"Dr. Laura" - HATE HER. Hate her stupid callers. This is how the program works: 1)Someone calls up and tells Dr. Laura how wonderful she is and how grateful they are to be speaking with her, 2) They tell Dr. Laura their problem, 3) Dr. Laura tells them they're an idiot, 4) the caller gets all quiet and sortof offended, 5) Dr. Laura says something like "I'm sorry, but..." then calls them an idiot again, 6) the caller thanks Dr. Laura for her "help". EVERY SINGLE CALL GOES LIKE THIS!!! ...And yet, I can't help but listen to the show and yell at all of them for being morons as though they could hear me.


"KVNU: For The People" - Two under-informed guys from Logan rant about stuff they don't understand. Occasionally they make good points, but more often than not they read a headline from the newspaper and jump to conclusions. I couldn't stand these guys if I had to listen to them for more than the 5 minutes it takes for me to drive home from work.


"Sean Hannity" - I try not to listen to him. Ever. All the obnoxiousness from Rush but with none of the humor. When this comes on I usually check NPR.


"Coast to Coast Live" - The best radio program EVER. Unfortunately this program is on way late at night, so I usually only hear it when I'm driving to or from Logan at night. Have you ever listened to it? If you enjoy listening to the rantings of crazy people, this is the show for you!! The show is done very professionally and unbiased, which is quit amazing considering the topics they cover. My personal favorite show was when they had a guy on talking about how mankind was created by aliens to mine gold for them, but then we revolted, and most things in the bible are actually events having to do with these aliens (the Tower of Bable, for example, which was actually a launching pad for inter-planetary space ships). Other good episodes have dealt with hauntings, Men In Black, Mothman sightings, and how robots will one day become self aware and wipe out humankind. The show's completely ridiculous, and I love it. Whenever I need to drive long distances, I try to do it late at night so I can listen to "Coast To Coast Live" while I'm on the road.


So Talk Radio...love it? Hate it? ...thoughts?

What a croc...

Being an avid fan of the Olympic Games, I've spent considerable time the last few days watching various coverage of the Olympics in Beijing.

The best moment so far: The men's 4x100m freestyle swimming relay!! Holy cow!!! If you missed it, I'm so sorry!! If you saw it and didn't jump up screaming as it finished, you're probably a terrible person. It was incredible!! I saw a replay of it this morning on the Today Show and got goose bumps all over again...so amazing!

The worst moment so far: The commercials! What is wrong with advertisers these days?!? Okay so there are a couple of good ones, but so many of them are SO awful!!

This blog isn't so much about a bad commercial, but about a bad product for which I don't ever recall having seen a commercial until this weekend: Crocs.

Why, people?! WHY?!? Alright, calling them a "bad product" may be harsh. I mean, I don't consider fishing waders a bad product, but they shouldn't ever be worn, say, to the mall. That's the problem with crocs. People think it's okay to wear them outside the privacy of their homes. WHY are people wearing them outside the privacy of their homes!?!? WHYYYY?!?!?!

An actual (as close as I can remember the exact words) conversation I had a few years back with a friend about her crocs...

Jinx: "Why would you wear them out in public? They're SO goofy-looking!"
Friend: "I know, but they're so comfortable!"
Jinx: "Yeah, but slippers are 'so comfortable'...do you wear your slippers out in public?"
Friend: "No."
Jinx: "Why not?"
Friend: "Cuz it would look weird."
Jinx: "!"

Now I'm no slave of fashion! Believe you me!! I've never owned a designer anything in my life. But c'mon! When people like ME are able to point out a shoe fashion faux-pa, it's SERIOUSLY time to consider a change in footwear.

Please, wear them around the house, in the garden, even to the beach...I could see that. But people, please. They're not "cute". They're bad. So very, very bad.

Scrambled!!!

If you are lkie me, then you plbbraoy rcvieee your sarhe of rnadom ealims taht ciotnan random jkeos, funny pceiutrs, or lsits of stnrgae and irtsnnetieg ftacs. One scuh eaiml taht I've seen ciaurlectd seevarl temis is the cailm taht pelpoe tend to jsut skim over wdors wlihe rdeinag, and throefree the atcual oedrr of the leertts is not vrey itpnmaort. The email cialms taht athulogh i'ts srtagne to look at, the aervage psroen can siltl read at aobut the smae rate so long as the fsrit and lsat letrtes of the wodrs raimen in pacle. Well I hvae dcedied to put taht cialm to the test.

As I am srue it is ovrely obuvois to aynone rineadg this psot, by the time I ataclluy pibuslh tihs to my blog, this etnry will hvae been scblmeard fllownoig the guiiendle taht just the fsrit and lsat ltretes need to rimean in tiher prpoer plcaes. To tset out the toehry I just sepnt aobut 10 mintues wriintg a litlte prrgoam taht tkaes a text file, sptlis up all the wdors and then scremblas the inenr letrets. I am cuerlrtny wrntiig this psot unisg natoepd, then rghit bferoe I piusblh it, I will run it trohguh my pgroarm and chcek out the retusls.

I was qiute iemsepsrd at how eailsy I was albe to raed the llitte massgee taht cmoes with taht eaiml...I wednor if it wlil be as easy to raed this, or if taht eamil csohe vrey spfeciic wodrs that it knew wloud be easy to read when sbrleamcd. Let me konw!

Summer Snowboarding

This dream was really quite long, but all I remember is the ending of it...

*** Dreamt June 30 - July 1, 2008 ***

Whatever the other events in the dream were, they culminated in there being a snowboard competition that was being put-on by the University. My favorite teacher in the Computer Science Department - Dean Mathias - was doing some of the officiating, and was in charge of the event to some extent (other teachers had to keep asking him questions about what was going on and about rules and stuff).

The competition was more or less a "Best Trick" competition, except that you actually got to do several tricks on a single run. The competition was being held right outside old main where this HUGE ramp (which was FAR to big to actually fit in the QUAD in real life) had been constructed. The apparatus was made of wood and was enormously tall on each of the two sides with a huge dip in the middle that had several jumps made out of snow in it. People would start at the top and snowboard down, gaining speed until they hit a jump, at which point they'd throw some huge trick, then land and prepare for another huge jump, then eventually they'd start to slope up and they'd end up at the top of the other side (obviously friction was not a factor here).

I did my run and apparently did quite well (I don't actually remember my run) because Dean was congratulating me...it was at this point in the dream that Dean no longer looked like Dean, but instead looked like Ben Linus from Lost; this wasn't frightening or upsetting in anyway in my dream, because it was just Dean, but in retrospect it was definately Ben playing the part of Dean.

Anyway, right about then my friend Alisha Geary showed up!! We were all really relieved because we hadn't been sure if she was going to show up in time to complete, but she made it in the nick of time. As her run began, the camera angle of my dream changed to an overhead view of Alisha, so I could see her run really well, and it was INCREDIBLE!! She only hit one jump, but as she went off it she threw her head back to begin the rotation for a double backflip, she made it through the first but in the second she lost her momentum and kindof got stuck upside down. Then, defying all physics, she tucked her head and reversed the direction of her flip mid-air so she came back around and landed it cleanly. The crowd was going crazy!!

She came over to me and I said, "Holy cow, Alisha, that was awesome! I didn't think you were going to be able to recover from the second flip, but then you somehow got the board back underneath you!!" She looked just a little miffed, but still happy. Apparently my lack of confidence in her being able to pull out the second flip was the wrong thing to have told her. We went over to Ben-Dean and the other judges to see how they were going to rank her, but they decided that since she was school faculty that she couldn't rightfully be in the competition. They then decided instead to instate her as a judge to represent the city of West Point (my home town).

*** *** ***

A Whacked Dream

*** Dreamt June 15-16, 2008 ***

I was at this REALLY tiny shack that was located near the field behind my grandparents house. Inside the shack everything was black, white, and gray. The interior consisted of a small bedroom with a rather large, comfy-looking, white bed in it that pretty much filled the entire room, and a hall that had a closet at one end and a swinging door that led to a kitchen at the other. This was being used as the set of "Fear Tactics"....which was knock off of "Scare Tactics" (For those unaware, "Scare Tactics" was his terribly evil show on the Sci-Fi Channel where they would just scare the crap out of the people....think of "TV's Bloopers & Practical Jokes", but instead of funny pranks, they would make the target of the gag think he/she was witnessing an alien landing or a haunting or other freaky stuff....I think the show got sued by several of the people they'd punk'd so they ended up getting pulled off the air). Anyway, I was in the crew of this show, but I wanted to try it out anyway to see how it would feel if I were the victim of the prank.

The prank we were going to pull was the person would walk down the hall towards the kitchen area, then somebody would emerge from the kitchen area wielding a knife and come at them. (Yes, our prank - apparently - was to make the person think they were about to be MURDERED! ...can you smell a law-suit on this one?). So I did it...I walked down the hall, and right as I got to the kitchen door it swung open and there was Johnny Depp with a huge cleaver. I was freaked! I backed away as quickly as I could until I got to the closet at the end of the hall, which I promptly climbed into to hide. Right about then the target of our prank came in the house, but I was now trapped in the closet so they wouldn't see me.

The stunt went down as planned, Johnny Depp came at 'em with a knife, they freaked, we all had a good laugh. When it was over I came out and found the cast and crew all out there. Among them now was actress Helena Bonham Carter...I'm not sure what role she'd played in it, but there she was. As we were discussing the prank we decided this was going to make for a really great episode of the new show "Whacked!!", which was billed as "the ongoing adventures of Sweeney Todd". That's why Helena Bonham Carter was there...we were filming "Whacked"...not "Fear Tactics" at all, it turns out.

I decided to go pay my grandparents a visit since they lived so close, when I got there I found most of my family there watching TV, and right then a commercial for "Whacked!!" came on. I was so excited!! I told them all that I was in the show and that I got killed in the pilot episode. They were all very proud.

*** *** ***

Okay...not the wild & craziest dream I've ever had, but for some reason I haven't been remembering a lot of my dreams lately. This dream is, however, an excellent example of how in dreams things can change at the drop of a hat and it all seems to make perfect sense. We were definitely filming "Fear Tactics" and then all of the sudden it was now "Whacked!!"...which was never explained to me, but I completely knew what "Whacked!!" was.

Tut, tut, it looks like rain...

I get SO annoyed at bad weather. It just sucks the energy right out of me and I want to sit around and be grumpy. I'm especially annoyed at the moment because (per my last post), I'd just gotten into the swing of being more active, and then all of this dreariness started looming over us in Logan. Sure, I could go the gym & be active, but being stuck inside isn't what I want...I want to be outside walking or running. Saturday, Sunday, & Monday I went on the nicest walks around town...no where in particular...just briskly walking around for an hour or so, and it was great. But the last 3 days it keeps being all drizzley and nasty...I hate it.

It's kind of a strange thing how glancing outside has the power to change one's mood so profoundly. Stranger still is when the weather changes quite rapidly on you, and your mood follows. I definitely feel different when it's raining vs when it's sunny...even if I'm indoors. The most striking example of this was when I used to work in a windowless part of the building at SDL...there'd be days where when I got to work and it was cloudy and raining, so I'd be in a "rainy" mood all day, then suddenly I'd pass a window and see that it was now sunny outside, and I could practically feel my mood re-adjusting itself to match the weather. It's like when you go to the movies in the afternoon & you expect it to be night when you walk outside, but when you exit and all that sunlight so unexpectedly hits you, you have to sortof re-adjust your state of mind to be in a day-time mood instead of a night-time mood.

Am I the only one who experiences this? I can't be, right?

I'm sore...it must be spring

I started running almost two weeks ago, and I now have this bizarre mixture of exhaustion and energy...two things that don't SEEM like they should be able to co-exist. My legs are super tired and rather sore, and yet I feel like I want to go run some more...stupid endorphins.

Every year I get all excited about the warm weather and I start exercising and by the end of the summer I'm typically in great shape (well..decent) and down 15-20 lbs or so from where I started, and then it starts to get cold again and I lose all motivation, so by the next summer I'm once again dreadfully out of shape and pretty much back where I was before the previous summer.

At the end of last summer my typical morning/evening run was a two mile trip that took me about 20 minutes (6 mph on average...not terrible). I've been doing the 2 mile thing again this year, and each time so far it's taken me closer to 30 minutes (4 mph...bleh). This is, of course, to be expected considering the majority of my exercise in the past 8 months has consisted of getting up from my computer to grab a soda. Still annoying, though.

Today I lifted weights for the first time since this exercise kick started. Oh man...I'm not sore yet, but I am SO MUCH going to be so tomorrow.

This just in: Work of Fiction May Not Represent the Truth

With the West Virginia democratic primaries, the massive earthquake in China, the deadly cyclones in the southern U.S., and the relief effort in Myanmar, one wonders how reporters with the AP/CNN had any time to research such a ground-breaking report as is found on CNN.com today in their article (I am not making this up):
Experts: 'Indiana Jones' pure fiction

That's right! The folks over at CNN have unraveled Steven Spielberg's greatest hoax: Indiana Jones is not a documentary!!

I know!! I was just as shocked as all of you!!

I, for one, am really hoping that this is the first in a series of 'outings' to be done by CNN...think of the possibilities!

Rocky Balboa...not a real boxer?

Yosemite Sam...not a real cowboy?

Luke Skywalker...not a real Jedi?


I shudder to think of what shocking investigative journalism CNN will undoubtedly dazzle us with tomorrow!

Yea-Yay-Yeah

I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE!!! The American public school system has failed us so thoroughly on this topic that I've decided that I have to make a little lesson about it myself. C'mon, guys...."Yea", "Yay", and "Yeah" are not the same word! I'm SHOCKED at the number of times I see these words incorrectly spelled. Be it in emails, letters, blog posts, or whatever, I'm constantly seeing the wrong Y-word used. Let's start off with some formal definitions...

Yea - \ˈyā\ (adverb, noun) : 1.'Yes' - used in oral voting. 2. indeed - formally. 3. 'Not only this but even'.

Yay - \ˈyā\ (interj.) : An exclamation of pleasure, approval, elation, or victory.

Yeah - \ˈyeə, ˈyaə\ (adverb) : 'Yes' - casually.


I know, I know. Typos happen. But this isn't strictly a typo issue. I see it ALL the time in print (mostly, I theorize, because that's MOSTLY what's available to read), but I've seen these same mistakes occur at approximately the same frequency in pen-to-paper writing, so it's not just a simple muscle-memory typo; people, as a majority, seem not to know this.

'Yea'. Now what I see ALL THE TIME is people inappropriately writing/typing 'Yea' when they mean one of the other two. I don't think I've ever seen (or at least noticed) the other spellings used incorrectly. The funny thing, however, is that "yea" should almost NEVER be used!! It's used in voting and in scripture-formal language to express 'indeed' or 'not only this but even...' and that's really about it!! (Ex. "How does the representative from Utah vote that the improper use of 'yea' should be allowed to continue, 'yea' or 'nay'?" "We vote 'nay', yea, we vote 'nay' whole-heartedly.")

'Yay' is our celebratory exclamation. Write this word when you're happy about something (or unhappy but feel like being sarcastic). (Ex. "We're all going to stop mis-using the word 'yea' all the time! Yay!!!")

'Yeah' is probably the most frequently USED word of the three, and yet, the most frequently written as 'yea'. That extra 'h' at the end makes all the difference in the world by changing our 'yeah' from an affirmative vote to a casual 'yes'. (Ex. "Yeah, I'm kinda anal about this whole 'Yea-Yay-Yeah stuff', but it's driving me crazy!")


Help make this a success!! ...It may end up being the first in my adult education series. Next on the docket: How right-of-way works at 4-Way-Stop Intersections.

End of Semester School Dream

****** Dreamt April 22-23, 2008 ******

I was in class in the Geology building on campus. I've had a couple classes in that building, so nothing was particularly striking about that. I'm not sure what class was being taught, but the teacher was Dean Mathias - the guy who's teaching the game development class I'm currently taking. Dean went around the room passing back an assignment, on which I scored "+15". What that meant in my dream, was that this was an on-going assignment where we turn it in, he scores it, gives it back, then we do some more work on it and he scores it again, adding points...this, apparently, would go on several times.

At the end of class he called for the assignment to be turned back in so he could score it again, but I hadn't done anything new on it! I panicked. I rushed up and asked him what were the new things we were supposed to have done on it, and he said we were supposed to have been filling in several answers about how to use Secants and Cosecants as he was lecturing about them during class. I was really worried, 'cuz I hadn't been paying attention in class, so I asked if I could turn it in late. He told me that if I brought it to his house no later than that night, I could still receive full credit. I was SO relieved!!

I then proceeded out of the building, which seemed to lead into the HPER building, and I headed to some class I had there. I think it was supposed to be a theater class, but when I looked in, everybody was doing yoga. I kinda sneaked in and watched for a few minutes, then decided it was too weird and left.

Suddenly it was the next morning and I was going to class when I realized I'd forgotten to bring my assignment to my teacher's house!!! I was stressing big time. I figured he'd probably be out street racing, 'cuz my teacher (in my dream) was a really big car guy. I headed to a neighborhood in Syracuse where a friend of mine used to live and, sure enough, there was a whole ton of tricked-out cars getting ready to do some street racing, but I couldn't find Dean! I asked some people if they knew where he was, or where he lived (something I probably should have found out before I agreed to bring my assignment to his home the night before), but nobody seemed to know. I woke up right about then, quite panicked about needing to bring that assignment to my teacher, I started to get out of bed in a rush when reality set in.

****** ******

I HAVE CREATED PHYSICS!!

After several weeks of plugging away at it, I have created Physics!! And yesterday another member of my group created rain!! ...We feel we're dangerously close to becoming supreme beings.

For the utterly confused, I'm in a Game Development class, and these are components for the game we're working on. It's a physics-based side scroller, and I'm not really sure how fun it'll end up being in the end, but it'll be kinda cool, at least.

The final version of the game doesn't need to be finished until NEXT Friday, but we have a major milestone that NEEDS to be reached by this Friday, so we've been working overtime lately. Yesterday I was up at 4:30am to work on it, I continued working on it until 11:30am when I went to work, I stayed there until a little after 5:00pm when I went home grabbed a bite to eat and headed back up to the school, and I was there until 11:30pm. But right at the end, my physics started fully working, so it was all worth it!! I now have fully working gravity, collisions, and joints...if you'd like a real-world example of these three things in action, simply run into a wall and then go limp. Actually, it'd be difficult for you to observe these if you're the one running...maybe get a friend to do it. Better yet, set up a video camera and record yourself doing the experiement...then send me a copy.

'80s Bash at Harry & David

Here's another dream for the "Whaaa??" category...

**** Dreamt April 14-15 2008 ****

I was at the Harry & David store in Park City, but the store was MUCH larger than it really is. In real life, the store is quite small, but in my dream it was pretty huge and also, a restaurant. For those who may not know, Harry & David is a store that specialized in fruits, nuts, and chocolate-covered fruits & nuts. Yes, it's kindof an odd concept, but if you're ever in the Park City area, bored out of your mind while the women-folk you're with are shopping at the outlet malls, let me recommend swinging by Harry & David...they give free samples!!

ANYWAY, so I was at Harry & David, and there was a big '80s party going on. Everybody was dressed up with huge hair, tons of bracelets, leg warmers, and jackets with far too many zippers on them. The lights were dimmed and there was a projector showing classic '80s music videos. I was having a great time with all of my friends (none of whom I recognized as ACTUAL friends in real life). We were talking about how much fun the party was and how it was JUST like high school, when suddenly I realized, "Wait! This isn't just like High School at all! I wasn't in high school in the '80s...I wasn't even in Jr High in the '80s! And since WHEN has Harry & David been a restaurant?!?"

Very rapidly the acceptance of the ridiculous that seems so natural in dreams faded and I awoke to find Olivia Newton John's "Let's Get Physical" playing on my clock radio. How my radio got tuned to an '80s rock station is beyond me!

******

Interpretations welcome!

"Halt Die Klappe!"

So last night my trying-to-sleep roommate texted me to "Halt Die Klappe!". I, of course, don't speak German, so it seemed like an absurd thing to text me, because if it was instructions of some kind, I sure wasn't going to be able to follow. Luckily another roommate was in the room who claims to know some German, and he told me it meant "Shut up!". I thought surely that can't be right...if anything my roommate would have just said, "be quiet", right? Nope, I looked it up today on multiple sites and all of them interpretted it as a harsh way of telling a German to shut up (several of the interpretations included swear words to define its more precise English meaning).

Now I don't take offense to my arian roomie, because - as stated before - I don't speak German so a harsh phrase in it just sounds like gibberish to me (although I was a tad annoyed that he didn't just open his door and say something, as it was several people being loud). But it got me thinking about curse words. Now language itself is a very odd phenomenon if you think about it...this odd collection of sounds which somehow have meaning to us, but swearing is extra-odd. The concept that certain sound combinations OFFEND us is really kindof mind-boggling. What is it about these words that offend us anyway? It's obviously not the actual meaning behind the word, 'cuz there's a non-swearing way to say the same true meaning behind every curse word I can think of.

Is it bad to swear in another language? I guess it's the same bad-ness that is if you swear when you're by yourself. I've heard it said that the reason it's "bad" to swear is that the offender is exhibiting a loss of self control...but what if you say a swear word NOT in a moment of anger with no malice AND it's in another language...it's completely meaningless to you and your audience...that's not really bad, is it? But then if that's the case is it bad to simply SAY a swear word in your native tounge if you're by yourself (so as not to offend anyone) if you're not saying it in anger and are just saying it for fun? lol. Anyway, just some random thoughts that came from an evening of keeping my poor, sleepy roommate awake. ^^

Drunken Nights With No Hangover!!

This past week I've had 3 (THREE!) nights where I dreamt that I was drunk. It's not a recurring dream per se, as the circumstances change in each dream, but definately a recurring theme. Now not ever having been drunk I don't know what it really feels like, so I don't know how accurate my dreaming representation of it is...basically I just feel really relaxed and kinda dizzy. It was actually kinda nice, lol. Don't worry, I'm not gonna go out and buy a liter of Jack Daniel's or anything...anyway, I think I'd be more of a Scotch man...there's just something sexy about scotch...not sure what it is.

AAAANYWAY...The question in my mind is, 'WHY do I keep having dreams in which I'm inebriated?' Back when I read the "The Outsiders" I had LOTS of dreams in which I smoked, but smoking is a big topic in that book (and EXTREMELY romanticized), so it doesn't surprise me that it was on my mind, but why all these dreams about being drunk is beyond me. My only conclusion is that I had the dream once and it was just a weird random thing, but then I kept thinking about that dream, so I dreamt about it again, and now it's sorting of turning into a self-perpetuating theme of my dreams.

Oh well...I guess I can't complain, they're not "bad" dreams, and I get to experience something that I'll never get to in real life...even if it is only what I imagine it would be like.

Academy Awards Party 2008...er...2007?

Last night was the 80th Annual Academy Awards (which took place in 2008 but award movies that were released in 2007...I think the academy would refer to it as the 2007 Academy Awards, but I think it's safer to just stick with "80th Annual..."), and we had a great party!! If you didn't know about it, sorry. If you did know about it and didn't come, you missed OUT!! Go ahead, feel bad!...I'll wait. All of you people who said "Nah...I don't really care about the Oscars" or "It sounds interesting but I think we'll pass" or other similar responses, you need to talk to those who attended...it was FUN...I'm not gonna throw a lame party...I mean c'mon...it's me!

There were oscar quizzes, ballots so you could vote for the nominees, yum-tastic hamburgers cooked on the grill, and even cookie salad!! ...yeah....you'll have to ask Thad about the cookie salad.

Much like "No Country For Old Men", our roommate Michael was the big winner last night, winning two fabulous prizes; one for taking 1st in one of the oscar quizzes AND one for tying for 1st in the oscar ballots. Other winners included Thad, Jared, & Jennae.

After last night's experience I think next year there'll hopefully be a bit more enthusiasm for my Oscar Party (at least from those in attendance this year), and I guess we'll have to make a special, full ballot (instead of just selections from the "major" categories) for Thad. Here's a big thanks to Michael, Jennie, Thad, Laurie, Jennae, Ben, & Amanda who all had a good time and helped make the party a success! Oh and, again, if you did miss out, make arrangements to swing by and eat some of Thad's Cookie Salad...please.

Betty the Harddrive (2003-2008)

After several years of faithful service, Betty the Hard Drive passed away Thursday night due to complications from Alzheimer's disease. Just a child by human years, Betty recent celebrated her 5th birthday. Betty stuck by her master's side through 8 apartments and 24 roommates. She loved to run, to memorize things and, towards the end of her life, to skip. Last November, Betty became very ill with the onsaught of alzheimer's and we thought we may lose her, however, with the prayers of friends and family, and the help of I.T. consultant S'ven Haderlie, she was able to stay with us these past four months.

Despite her undying loyalty to her master, Jared Garlick, it is believed that Betty was an evil Harddrive, and is more than likely now burning in hell.

Betty the Harddrive is survived by her Motherboard, Betty the Motherboard.

"Watch the Sun Come Up"

Last night after an exciting episode of "Lost", a bit of stimulating conversation, and a rousing game of "Signs", what were left of the Lost Party People (the LPPs) hung out in the front room of the ButterKnife Estates and unwrapped lots of Valentine's Day candies to see what was written on the inside of the wrappers, which were sortof like Valentine's Day fortune cookie messages. Both the first and third that I opened read "Watch the Sun Come Up", to which I exclaimed each time, "No!!" ...I mean seriously, do you REALIZE how early the sun comes up?!? If I have to leave the house at 7:45am (which I do on Fridays), I make it a point to never get up before 7:30!

Well this morning I found myself just about to enter Old Main at about 8:10 heading to my 8:30 class when I glanced at the mountains to the East and noticed that the sun was just about to come up over them. "Who am I to argue with a piece of candy?", I thought, and I stepped off the sidewalk to face the arrival of the sun. It was actually quite a relaxing thing to just stand there for 13 minutes watching and waiting. As it turns out, although the sun "officially" rose this morning at 7:24am, the sun didn't peek over the mountains until 8:23am...I know, 'cuz I was there. Standing there, I became very aware of all of the other people who were bustling to and from classes, as I had just been moments before; I hadn't really noticed them when I was among them...funny how that is.

It had been a LONG time since I'd actually witnessed the sun coming up, and I'd forgotten what it looks like at that moment the sun first appears. The edge of the mountains grew brighter and brighter, and I began to wonder if the appearance of the sun may be a let down and that it would almost unnoticably slide into view with how bright it was becoming along the cusp of the mountains. Maybe I would be standing there, watching, and suddenly think, "Oh wait a minute, it's already up!"

A few professors from my department passed me, discussing how it's a shame how so many professors in the C.S. department only want to teach the graduate level classes. I continued to watch. It was SO bright now. "Is this bad for my eyes?", I wondered, "Is it up yet?" I looks around on the ground...no shadows. I checked the blue part of the sky...no clouds. Nope, definately not up yet. I continued to watch.

A car pulled up and girl got out with an armful of books. She thanked the driver, slammed the passenger side door, and headed up to Old Main. I wondered if she wondered what I was doing, just standing there in the cold. As I had walked up Old Main Hill I'd thought about how cold it was, but now that I could just stand there with my hands in my pockets, it didn't seem so bad.

The edge of the mountain exploded. Golden light shot out in four directions where the mountain had been brightest. This definately was noticable. What started out as a tiny point source of golden light was rapidly increasing in size...it was fascinating how long it took the sun to peek over the mountains, and yet once it caught a glimpse of what was on this side, it wanted to fully clear the obstructing pile of rocks as quickly as possible. A gust of air came from the east as I looked around to make sure there were shadows now...there were. "Excellent," I thought,"what a well spent few minutes."

I climbed back onto the sidewalk, turned, and went to class.

WARNING!! VERY, VERY SAD PICTURE AHEAD!!

So my poor, poor niece Addison developed RSV last weekend which then turned into pneumonia AND bronchitus!! To try to soften the blow of the dangerously sad picture below of her in the hospital last weekend, I've included 2 pictures of when she was in Utah (and healthy) over Christmas.

Awww, what a cute Santa-Baby!!!



Boxes are WAY funner than toys, anyday!!


Sad, sad Addison in the hospital last week right after having her oxygen hooked-up, having her first nebulizer treatment, and undergoing SEVERAL unsuccessful attempts at giving her an i.v....they tried in each of her arms AND in her foot to find a good vein to use, but all they succeeded in doing was torturing the poor kid. =(


What a poor, poor baby! It makes me wanna cry!

She's doing much better now, though.
Here's proof:

She's still not back to 100%, but she's home and feeling much, much better.